Chapter 12

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Chapter 12
Decisions Decisions

     Wes stared at himself in the mirror. He had had just enough time the day before to get a haircut. Acacia came to do Farrah’s hair again, and Dana had found a suit for Wes and a dress for Farrah. Wes’ stomach was tail spinning with nervousness. He kept repeating in his head Farrah will stay with me. He wanted to believe this was true but pictured visiting her at some random foster home, or worse living with his mother and being hurt. He was determined to not let that happen. He didn’t care what his lawyer would say, he was going to tell the judge exactly what he thought.

     Acacia finished Farrah’s hair and announced her into the living room like a movie star. Everyone said how beautiful she looked, and said Acacia had done a great job. Iris gave Dana a big hug and ushered Acacia out the door, knowing that they would all need to leave soon. Farrah ran to Acacia and wrapped her arms around her. “Thank you.” Farrah said.

     “You’re welcome and good luck today.” Acacia said hugging her back.

     Acacia walked over to Wes, who looked very pale at the moment. “It will all be okay” she said looking him right in the eyes, and grabbing his hands. A half smile emerged on Acacia’s face and Wes mimicked the reassuring gesture.

     The drive to the court house was dead silent in the jeep. Farrah gazed out the window. If she looked at Wes she might start crying. The clouds overhead looked like they might too. Farrah fought with all her might not to fall apart. She did not want to disappoint Wes or worry anyone, so she cept her body together while her mind and heart crumbled.

     Wes saw this building everyday he went to Dana’s for work. Today would be the first time he stepped foot into it. It was three stories and newer with lots of large glass windows. When they approached the double glass doors Peter said “there is a metal detector so ditch the guns before we go in”. Dana gave Peter a very dirty look and no one laughed. Peter’s humor meant to lighten up the dreary crowd didn’t pass a bit. Farrah hadn’t even understood the joke; her focus was on not crying.

     The guards stood and had everyone emptying their pockets. Farrah beeped when she went through the large machine. They began wanding her body to find the source. “Take off your shoes please” said one of the guards. Farrah slipped off her black shoes that had small metal studding and put them on the conveyer belt. She was beep free when she went through the next time. Everyone had finished their turns through the detector as Farrah was finishing the fastening of her shoes. Peter got directions from a guard and the headed to an elevator.

      Waiting outside the elevator on a small bench was Gina, and Sabeen. Unlike Wes’ solemn and quiet crowd, Sabeen and Gina were chatting it up. Wes became annoyed. Gina was supposed to be his lawyer but it seemed like she really wanted to help Sabeen.

     It wasn’t until they arrived on the next floor when Farrah saw the man she hit on Christmas Eve. He stood next to a stalky woman holding a file. Her dress was loud with color, and if they were not in a court house Wes would swear this women was a tourist on a cruise. He had seen enough thank you pictures in Dana’s office to know what they looked like. When the grey haired man who Farrah had he outburst with saw all of them he came up to them.

      Farrah wanted to burst out crying again. She felt bad that she had hit the man. She also felt so scared of him too. He was the one who wanted her to go live with strangers.

     “Hello Peter.” The man said.

     “Ron.” Peter said.

     “Looks like you beat us to a court case. We were planning on doing this as well.”

     “Actually, I didn’t do anything. We are just here supporting Wes and Farrah. Wes found a lawyer who got this all together.”

     “Well he certainly is resourceful isn’t he? I can tell you the office is not the same without you. I really wish you would reconsider.”

     “Ron, for once,  I am actually helping. I am not going to give up on these guys. Some things in the system are broken; I can either be a part of fixing it or enabling it.”

     “I am sorry you feel that way.”

     “I’m not.” Wes interrupted.

     Silence took over the room. It was only broken by a thin bailiff who escorted them into the courtroom. The bailiff must have been at least 60, and he walked with a limp. Farrah watched the man and started thinking of reasons he could have that limp. He could have fell this morning. He is a war vet who was shot in the leg. A dog mauled it years ago. This helped her escape from her deafening fears.

     Everyone was seated and waited for a couple minutes before the bailiff called out. “All rise for the honorable Robert Young presiding.”

     Everyone in the room rose. Wes could feel the tension rise as well. The judge sat and banged his gavel. Wes sat along with everyone else. He nudges Farrah, who for some reason still stood. She came out of her day dream and sat next to Wes.

     “Now, I have read this case thoroughly. From what I understand this is kind of a mess. So I am letting you know right now that I am keeping this hearing as informal as possible. Does anyone have any objections to that.” Said Judge Young. No one spoke. “Good. I am going to call people up ask questions, hear from both the state and Mrs. Gina Lastelle and then I will make my ruling.”

     “Wesley Marsh, you are first.”

     Wesley’s pale face did not darken since the house and held his hands together clasping to both contain his nervousness and hold it together. He was sworn in and waited for his questioning.

     “Now Wes, I want you to tell me, what brings us here. I understand you have acquired an attorney and brought us all together.”

     “Well I want custody of my sister.”

     “Yes that I know. I want the background, the history. You are the first 18 year old boy I have ever had asking for custody of a child he did not bring into this world, and even the 18 year olds I do see are only here because their parents make them, so tell me.”  

     Wes started from the beginning. He didn’t hold back, he started with his dad’s accident that devastated the family. Then he went into the drugs she began taking from the doctor, and how it soon spiraled into binges and all nighters. Ho slowly she would disapeer for a day or two a week, then a week or two a month. Until she just stopped. Wes described Maggie as a savior of sanity for himself and Farrah. He described the night his mom came back just a couple months ago and being found out by social services. He went through the last two years in about 20 minutes and felt overwhelmed at all the things that had gone on.

     “Wes, I see you did what you could. You took charge and did what any decent man would do but you made mistakes. First keeping your life a secret was a mistake. What would you have done if Farrah broke a leg, got really sick? When was the last time she saw a doctor, a dentist, or had a physical? These are things that children need to. Not to mention having to hold all that grief in, so no one finds out. That was wrong of you to ask her to do. You see you are not a parent. These are things parents think about. Brothers and sisters have secrets and lie to people. That is a lot of pressure a little girl like Farrah doesn’t need. Do you understand that?”

     Wes felt scared. Was he making Wes admit he didn’t do a good job, making it easier for Farrah to be taken away?

     “Yes, I understand. I should have done better. You know Farrah didn’t see doctors while my mom was going crazy either.”

     “Mr. Marsh maybe you don’t get it. You are barely aloud to be called an adult.”

     Wes didn’t know how to feel about his interactions with the judge. He didn’t feel that it went well, and that put a heavy feeling in his chest. The judge called Sabeen.

     “You have a capable young man, you must have been doing okay at one point. What I want to know is why there is no family involved that could have helped Farrah and Wes.”

     “My family is rid of me. I mean the word is disowned me. I left Iraq to be with my husband. What I did was worthy of death. I come from a very strong Islamic family and sleeping with a Christian man before I was wed put shame on my family. My father had every right to kill me for my actions against Allah and my husband saved me. I have no family except what is here.”

     “And your husbands family?”

     “My husband’s mother died during his birth. His grandparents raised him until his grandfather passed with a stroke and his grandmother was put into a home. She had a sickness that would not let her remember people. I think it is Alzheimer’s. He was put into foster care when he was 12. He said he went to many homes. When he turned 18 he joined the military. He had no one.”

     “I see, so what is your purpose today?”

     “I want Farrah back. I am going into a program which will allow me to keep her. I am getting better.”

     “How long have you been clean?”

     “I am 6 weeks sober.”

     “In that six weeks how many times have you come to visit Farrah?”

     “None, I did not think it would be good. I promised to stay away the last time I saw them.”

     “Why would you promise that?”

     “Because I bring bad things to them. I brought a man who I owed money to and he could have hurt them. I don’t want to hurt my kids.”

     “I see, and now you are just fine and can take Farrah? Do you even know who Farrah is anymore? Do you think she has changed? I think it would change me as a boy if my mother did what you have done and I had a brother raising me.”

     “I want to know her. She needs a mother. A boy who is not done learning about the world cannot raise a girl.”

     “I think you taught your son more about the world than you realize.”

     “Do you have a job, Mrs. Marsh?”

     “No, but I am working on it. I have been working with Salvation Station and Step 2 and they are helping with housing and a job. I should get to move in this month.”

     “Do you have transportation?”

     “No, I sold our car a long time ago. I use the bus.”

     “Do you know where Farrah would go to school, would she be able to maintain at her current school? I see her grades are very impressive.”

     “No the program is in Reno she would have to move.”

     “Do you believe you can handle taking care of a child right now?”

     “I know I can be strong for her, if I can stay clean.”

     “Thank you Mrs. Sabeen you can step down.”

      The courts tension did not ease. The judge wanted to talk to Farrah and asked her if she was okay about speaking in front of everyone or if she would rather talk in private. Farrah put on her brave face and took the stand.

     “Farrah, do you know what your mother and brother have said today to be the truth?”

     “Well, I didn’t know some things, but I believe them.”

     “What do you mean?”

     “I didn’t know my dad’s mom died when he was born, and I didn’t know what my mom said about her family. I just figured they were too far away or something to talk to us.”

     “I understand. So other than that they were honest?” asked Judge Young.

     “Yes. They both told the truth.”

     “Then I know you will too?”

     “Yes, I will.”

     “Farrah how do you feel about going with your mom? You heard what she said.”

     “Honestly I don’t want to. I love you mom.” She turned and faced her mother as she said this. “I don’t want to live with her. I don’t know if she will do drugs again. I don’t know if she will keep me safe.”

     “And your brother, how do you feel about your brother.”

     “I love him. He makes sure I eat and has kept some really bad people away from me. He helps me with school and everything.”

     “Do you ever wish your brother didn’t have to take care of you?”

     Farrah looked down at her lap a whisper came out so softly that even the microphone didn’t pick up.

     “You will have to speak up.”

     Farrah felt like what she was about to say would destroy Wes. “Everyday.”

     “What do you mean Farrah?”

     Wes’ face looked confused his wrinkled up forehead and eye brows stared at Farrah. “He is so wonderful and he works so hard and he gives up so much, I feel bad everyday he has to take care of me. I know it is not my fault but his life would be so much better if I wasn’t in it. He would be in art school, or traveling with Acacia right now. He isn’t he works two jobs and worries about me every day. I love that he does it, but I wish he didn’t have to.”

     Wes wanted to stand up and let Farrah know it way okay he didn’t mind. She was worth it. The attorney must have caught on to his anxiousness, she gave him a hand motion to sit and relax.

     “Those are pretty grown-up selfless thoughts you know that Farrah? I can see why your brother gives up so much, it would be hard not to with someone as loving as you. Now Farrah what do you think about foster care?”

     “I don’t. I mean I don’t want to think about it or be in it. My dad was in foster care and he said it didn’t matter if they were super nice or just okay the state would always move him. He said he would have to change schools, and homes, and his stuff would get left behind. He said he started over so many times that it felt weird not to pick up and move after 6 months. I don’t want that. I may not have the best clothes, or toys but I have Wes and he is worth way more than those things.”

     “Farrah, how is life at the Shay’s? It is really nice, because Wes is there and Peter and Dana are awesome. They have two dogs Fee Fee, and Cha Cha, and I never had a dog before and I really like them.”

     “Okay, so Farrah I have one last question. I want to know what you want to be when your grown up.”

     Farrah smiled she had anticipated a much more serious question.

     “I don’t know exactly, but a teacher told me once I was an old soul who would change the world, I believe her, so I might do something big. Like become president or change laws to help people like Wes and I, or anyone who needs help.”

     “I believe you will! I really do, and you know what I agree with every word that teacher said and don’t let anyone tell you different.”

     I wanted to next give you a synopsis of a letter written by Paula Fitz, council I have made it available for you to read as well. She is both Farrah and Wesley’s state appointed councilor. The main point she makes is well, here I will read it. “Wes and Farrah stand the best chance of making it through this difficult time if they remain together. The bond that they share with each other is what has made it possible for them to make it this far. They have kept each other sane in the face of adversity and tragedy. The both suffer from PTSD but have a nonverbal cure for it when around one another. In my professional opinion Wes and Farrah should remain together in some fashion.”

     Wes was thankful Paula had done that. He knew she was out of town but she still wrote a letter for him.

     The judge called up Ron Tuttle from the state.

     “Mr. Tuttle what is the state’s request regarding Farrah Marsh? We believe Farrah would do well and prosper in a foster home, and we could help facilitate visitation with Wesley, her brother, and help Mrs. Marsh obtain housing to eventually move Farrah back with her.”

     “Mr. Tuttle if you deemed this girl to be in need of a foster home why was she not already removed?”

     “Well your Honor, Mr. Shay was their social worker and retired from his position. This left the Marsh case open and I just recently took it over. Our internal personnel issues have kept us from fulfilling our functions on this case.”

     “While she was a client of yours did you make sure Farrah was being seen by a doctor, dentist or other medical physicians? We obtained the therapist for Farrah.”

     “Actually Mr. Tuttle, I have submitted documentation as you have been given copies of that Peter Shay,  retired employee submitted requests for the state to cover therapy costs as their medical insurance does not cover mental health services currently. I also recall from this document that the denial came from, well who denied it Mr. Tuttle?”

     “I did your Honor.”

     “That’s right, you did. Now can you tell me why?”

     “At that time documentation was submitted that a Mrs. Margaret Paquette was taking care of them and things were going well.”

     “So, how did Mrs. Paula Fitz come into the picture with a denial?” Asked the Judge.

     “Mr. Shay found her and she accepted them as a pro-bono account.”

     “I see, now what has changed from the time of Mrs. Paquette’s death and now that makes it imperative that Farrah be removed?”

     “There is no guardian at this time that can take care of Farrah.”

     “She is in need of a guardian and the state will accept its duty and step in.”

      “I think I am done with you Mr. Tuttle.”

     Wes had no clue where this was going, it seemed like the only person he wasn’t upset with was Farrah. He didn’t know Peter had to do what he did with Paula, and knew Peter must have really cared.

     “I would like to see you no Mr. Shay.”

     Peter sat down and swore in just as everyone else had, and awaited his questioning.

     “Well, Mr. Shay I see you quit over this issue with Wes and Farrah, is that true?”

     “Yes, I chose to quit because my work hindered the success of Wes and Farrah staying together. I found it more important that they remain together than keeping my job.”

     “That is pretty noble of you, but how did quitting your job help?”

     “I was told by Mr. Tuttle that it was inappropriate to be letting my clients stay with me and that Wes, who was 18, did not need to be in the system but that I needed to find a home for Farrah. I refused and explained that I would go through the process like other foster parents and then be licensed to keep her and still allow Wes to remain with us. He said that would take too long and that she needed to go. That is when I quit.”

     “I see. I wish I had called you first, as I would like Mr. Tuttle to site the law that deems it inappropriate to help clients. I think that is all I need from you unless you have anything else you would like to add.”

     “I do have one thing. I understand what Farrah said, I to would hope that Wes could do the things he dreams of doing, but he loves Farrah to much to even second guess his decision. That is why I will stand behind Wes, I have met many parents in the system, but by far Wes is the most dedicated father figure I have ever seen.”

     “Thank you Mr. Shay.”

     Farrah knew Peter was right. Wes was the best. She hoped the judge would see this.

     “I think I am ready to make a decision unless council has anything else to present.”

     Both lawyers turned. Gina looked at Wes and asked if there was anything she wanted him to say.

     “Just let him get it over with.”

     Mr. Tuttle and the state attorney talked a while longer.

     “Today council.”

     Gina stood up, “Your Honor we have no further comments.”

     “The state rests as well.” Said the colorful women.

     “Okay we will recess for 15 minutes while I think over my decision. There is a lobby down stairs with a snack and soda machine. I will see you soon.”

Chapter 11

This will be the last chapter posted on this blog spot. You will have to contact me directly for future chapters. Due to the publication factors giving out more of this story now would not be a good idea. If you message me I may send you chapters privately. I hope you enjoy Wes, and Farrah and their story.

Chapter 11 

Ruins

     Wes went into a daze. He stared through his mother, like a window. She really wants to get clean he thought? Since when? She always said she would stop and never did. There were countless let downs when it came to school plays, recitals and conferences for Farrah. She had missed his student art show. He placed first in 2 categories, but instead of feeling elated he was hurt that everyone including kids whose work looked more like kindergarten finger paintings had proud parents there supporting them. There were days she said she would go and buy groceries and come home so far gone that she went to the next door neighbor’s apartment door. This women who Wes had cried and pleaded with to stop, had not, what was so different now. That was all he could stop and ask. “What is different now?”

     “Everything and nothing.”

     “What is that supposed to mean?” Wes said.

     “I am still an addict. I am not taking care of you two. I am still struggling and those things are all the same. But, I don’t want to use anymore. I don’t want to be addicted. I want to be there for Farrah, I have already ruined you. You were so sweet before, now you are so hard. I ruined you. I have a chance to help Farrah. I am sorry I wasn’t there for you.”

     “I am not ruined. How can you say that? You don’t even know me.”

     “Your right I don’t know you anymore. You are not the same Wes.”

     “You are not the same mother.”

     “You see we have both grown differently, and maybe you will forgive me one day, I don’t expect it, but I hope it.”

     “I will do whatever you want, just leave Farrah out of your life. She is doing good without you. She is strong and smart and I don’t want you to ruin her, as you have said you have done to me.”

     “It will take time but I will get better and you will trust me again with her. I am her mother.”

     Wes boiled inside. A rage lit from deep within. When he heard Sabeen say  I am her mother. She was not a mother.

     “Well, you’re not. You were for some time but you gave up that job. I’ll call my lawyer, but you will have to fight me for her. Farrah will not be sold. Do you remember that mom? Huh, do you? Do you remember when you got offered $300.00 from some pervert for an hour with Farrah? Do you remember me having to threaten to call the police? I do. Maybe that is what ruined me. Maybe that is why I am so hard, like you say.”

     “Maybe it is. I am glad you were there, I am glad you protected your sister. I will never do that again. I promise I will kill myself before I put you or her in harm’s way ever again. This curse is mine to bear not yours.”

     Wes was already walking out when Sabeen was making what he thought were empty promises. He wanted to call the lawyer as soon as he got back to the house. He took a cab home instead of walking. He was seconds in the door when he saw Acacia sitting in the living room.

     “Hey, I wanted to talk to you.” She said.

     “I kind of need to make a phone call can it wait just a little bit?”

     “Yeah, go for it, my mom won’t be here for like an hour.”

     “Awesome thanks.”

     Wes felt a little better, something about being around Acacia calmed him.

     Wes left a message for Gina on her voice mail when she didn’t answer.

     “Hi Gina, I found my mom. She is crazy she thinks she is going to get better and get Farrah back. Now we have to fight her and the state I am so mad. Anyway I will talk to you later.”

     Wes hoped Gina would call him back soon, but was happy to sit and talk with Acacia.

     “So what’s up?” Wes asked.

     “Well you know I came over this morning and did Farrah’s hair. Check it out it turned out so cute.” Acacia held up her phone with the picture of Farrah on it.”

     “Wow you did good. I am sure she loved it.”

     “Yeah, it was really fun, but we had this conversation, you know girl talk and she has some things going on at school that I think you should know about.”

     “Like what? She tells me everything.”

     “Well, she might be scared to tell you what she told me.”

     That comfortable feeling he had around Acacia disappeared. She knew Farrah what two days and now Farrah tells her things she couldn’t tell him. His thoughts raced and anger crept up again.

     “What would she be scared to tell me?” His words came stronger than he intended.

     “Some girl at school is making up roomers that she tried to have oral sex with some boy.”

     Wes’ anger changed to confusion. He understood immediately why Farrah would not want to tell him this, but telling Acacia? Why would she do that he wondered. 

     “I bet it is Missy. That girl is always starting crap. You know even after she announced to the class room the Farrah had gotten her back pack from a thrift store, the girl had the nerve to have her mom ask me to paint her a backpack like Farrah’s. She is nuts.”

     “Take it from an ex-mean girl, sometimes we do things just to one up. I don’t think I changed until reality smacked me in the face and I was treated the same way. If Missy has it out for your sister, she won’t stop, until Farrah has lost it. I still remember when one of my friends had it out for this girl named Bianca in 5^th grade. We tormented Bianca until her parents pulled her out of school. I still feel horrible about it. I can’t believe we did that?”

     “Why, why would you do that?”

     “Because that is what my friends did, so I did it. There was nothing wrong with Bianca to be honest I can’t even remember the roomers we started or why we did, except that Bianca was a really talented dancer. I mean she was awesome and I think my friend hated that Bianca always got chosen for bigger parts in ballet.”

     “I don’t get it. Farrah is not mean to anyone. She doesn’t deserve this.”

     “That is probably what it is. Farrah is nice, people like her because of it, and I am guessing Missy knows people don’t really like her.”

     “Okay Dr. Phil, so what do I do?” Wes said.

     “Well talk to her tonight, see if she will talk to you about it, and then maybe give her some advice to talk to a counselor, or something so that Missy has to stop.”

     Wes paced the floor after Acacia left. He waited for Farrah to come home or the phone to ring. He was anxious about both issues. He decided to calm himself by reading in his dad’s journal.

     My angel is alive. Her name is Sabeen, the boy is her brother. He might not make it. She doesn’t remember that it was me who brought her in; she only remembers handing him to me. She has a concussion the docs say. She is not sure how she got it. She speaks English very poorly, but I can understand her. She waits by his bed. I think she prays, but it sounds more like singing. A nurse today had to force her to eat. She said she would not eat until her brother was well, so the nurse told her she couldn’t stay there anymore. Sabeen swallowed a whole bowl of oatmeal without question. I am drawn to her. I feel like I should talk to her, but I stay away. What would come of my infatuation? We are worlds apart. I would have to leave her. I just wish we met in a different way.

     Wes was curious about what changed in his dad. How did he end up with his mother if he didn’t even talk to her? He wanted to read on and get his questions answered, but the phone rang.

     “Hello.” Wes answered.

     “Hey Wes, it’s Farrah. I am going to go to my friend Veronica’s house today. Her mom will drive. Do you think Peter or Dana can pick me up later?”

     “Well I kind of wanted to talk to you.”

     “Oh, well we have a big project can it wait?”  

     “Well was today okay?”

     “Yeah, actually it was Veronica and I have a new friend, she is going to help us too. Her name is Layla.”

     “Oh, as in Princess?”

     “No, Lay Lah, not Laya.”

     “Oh I see, well what is the project?”

     “Actually it is really cool. I had the best grades in class so I get to pick 2 people and we get to plan the entire Spring Dance. We even get a $200.00 budget. It was left over from the last fundraiser.”

     “Way to go, best in class!”

     “Thank you, thank you, please quiet the applause.”

     “Have fun Farrah, you deserve it.”

     Wes left the conversation feeling better about Farrah. He still wanted to talk to her, but knew she was okay for the moment. The pacing began again not to long after he hung up with Farrah. It was short lived, when he looked at his watch. He was supposed to be at Burger Hut in 20 minutes, and he hadn’t even changed into his uniform. Neither Dana nor Peter were home, so getting a ride from them was out of the question. He checked his pockets and figured he could call for a cab, but had remembered he already spent money on a cab earlier. Wes was going to have to call and let work know he would be late for the first time ever. He felt like apologizing to Maggie.

     When he called his manager answered.

     “Thank you for calling Burger Hut, are you calling in an order?”

     “Hey Mike it’s me Wes, I”.

     “Oh, Wes, hey I am glad you called. Raymond called in sick so I left a message for Sam and Todd and now they are both coming in. You want a night off? Then you can take Todd’s dayshift tomorrow.”

     Wes was relieved at how perfect this turned out.

     “Yeah that is fine.” Wes said.

     “Great, oh, I forgot what did you need?”

     “I called to see if you needed me to pick anything up before I came in.”

     “That was thoughtful, and a first, kind of weird Wes, but thanks I’ll talk to you later.”

     “Okay bye.”

     Wes went to the kitchen and opened the fridge. It was hard to remember a time when a fridge was this full. There were too many choices. Three different packages of lunch meat looked especially appealing. He began making a monster of a sandwich, and a monster of a mess. By the time he had finished the counters were covered in cut tomatoes, onions, lettuce leaves, pickles, and dressings. Peter walked in through the garage door and into the kitchen.

     “Did the fridge explode?

     Wes mumbled incoherently to Peter, trying desperately to swallow.

     “Don’t choke on my account I can wait.”

     Wes swallowed down his bite and again tried to talk. “Sorry, I will clean it up, after I made my sandwich I couldn’t wait to eat it.”

     “Dana busts me on the same thing all the time. I tell her the bread would get hard just sitting out.”

     “I will have to remember that.”

     “So, how did it go? Did you find your mom?”

     “Yeah, I did. I found her and found out she wants Farrah back. She says she is going into a Step 2 program that will give her a place to get better and live.”

     “I am familiar with Step 2. It is a good program if the person is really wanting to change.”

     “She should never have Farrah back.”

     “Wes, I have seen a lot of kids and even parents who have messed up and gotten healthier are better than none at all. I know your grown but you need a clean and sober mom too.”

     “How can you say that? I don’t need her. Farrah doesn’t need her. She will just mess up again.”

     “Did she seam clean today?”

     “Yeah, but she won’t stay that way. She will use again and then need money and then hurt Farrah.”

     “And hurt you.” Peter said.

     “Whatever, I’ll clean the kitchen.” Wes left his sandwich at the table and began cleaning the kitchen.

     “Your bread will get hard.”

     “I am used to stale bread.” Wes’ tone left no question that he was done talking to Peter about this subject. Wes knew that at least the attorney would be on his side. He wondered if she had listened to his message yet, and thought he would try calling again after he finished eating and cleaning.

     Wes called Gina’s phone again. This time it went straight to voice mail. He hung up before leaving a message. Wes wanted to do something, anything to get his mind off waiting for the phone call. He decided to read his dad’s next entrée.

     Sabeen talked to me today. I think she saw me staring. It is hard not to. She is a gorgeous creature. She has the biggest pouty lips that curve down on each side, it makes me want to make her smile. Her eyes are weary and sad all the time. She asked me how I was, and I admitted better than her and asked for an update on her brother. His name is Zaid. He was hit by some kind of bomb explosion. From what I calculated she walked more likely ran him about 7 miles to our medical tent. She is 19. He is 11. She wants to tell her parents she is okay and give them an update but she can’t leave Zaid alone. I offered to keep an eye on him, but she refused. I need to stop thinking about this girl. I know nothing can happen.

     Wes was approaching another entry when the phone in the kitchen ran. Wes went running through the house. He had forgotten where he left the phone.  He heard the beep of the phone and then Peter’s voice say hello.

     “Sure hold on I will get him. Wes it is Gina.” Wes had already found Peter and took the phone.

     “Hello.” Wes said.

     “Hi Wes, I got your message. When can she meet? I have an opening tomorrow at 3:00. I can meet her and you wherever.”

     “Did you get my message?”

     “Yeah, that is why I am calling.”

     “Well can we fight her? She can’t have Farrah. What is the plan?”

     “Wes she can get Farrah back, I know you don’t like hearing that, but that is a plausible option. If she can prove to the court she can take Farrah they will allow her to. This could be a good thing. Maybe  a judge will let you have guardianship until she is determined to be a suitable placement.”

     “You are supposed to be on my side. She is not and never will be a suitable placement.” Said Wes.

     “Well than you have nothing to worry about.”

     “She can’t go with my mother. A foster home would be better.”

     “Don’t whatever you do, don’t say that in court. Let’s talk with your mom tomorrow and work out our plan. I have already called and gotten a court date for you. We have one week to work all this out.”

     “You can talk to my mom. I am not going again. Whatever I need to know talk to me about later.”

     “Fair enough.” Gina said and then hung up.

     Wes hung up feeling defeated. His mother was not supposed to be in the picture. She was bad for the picture. Now she could waltz in and take Farrah, like everything was fine. He wanted nothing to do with his dad’s journal, it was all about her. For a second he wished that his dad never met her, or listened to himself. Then he thought of himself and Farrah and realized that his mother had served a purpose, but wanted to distance himself from her even more. Wes went to his room and grabbed the journal, his first instinct was to burn it or begin ripping it. He stopped himself and walked it into Farrah’s room and laid it on her bed. She enjoyed this journal, so he didn’t mind giving it to her.

     Wes’ week took a slugs pace. He felt like he was barely seeing Farrah. She was always at Layla’s or Veronica’s, and if she wasn’t he was working. Wes’ manager Mike started training him for an assistant position. Wes had no ambition to move up at Burger Hut, but the extra $2.00 an hour was all the incentive he needed. Dana kept him busy at the travel agency. Wes spent hours on the phone negotiating flights. He discovered he was good at getting low rates. His people skills were acquiring better discounts than even Dana had after 20 years of working with airlines. He researched every company first then used their own internal information against the. He would call one and explain that they might use another airline for their needs from now on because of their increase in delays due to plane malfunctions. The increase might only be 1% but that 1% turned into another 10% off the entire ticket price. Another tactic that worked was to let a major airline know they were going to stop using them because of the increase in prices on baggage and that other airlines were not doing this to them. That airline took off all the baggage fees and gave a 5% discount on any flight scheduled in the next year. Dana was happy to be able to offer her customers better prices, and was impressed by Wes and his dedicated spirit.

     Wes was avoiding two things this week. The first was calling Acacia. He didn’t understand his desire to call her, but she nagged at him. The second was giving into the feeling like he was fighting alone for Farrah’s safety. His mother, Peter and Dana, and even his lawyer thought it was okay to give Farrah over to his mom. He hated this. Thought of this as a slight against him, did her not do a good job with Farrah after all? When his thoughts raced like this he shut them down because all he wanted to do was take Farrah and run. 

     Wes stared at himself in the mirror. He had had just enough time the day before to get a haircut. Acacia came to do Farrah’s hair again, and Dana had found a suit for Wes and a dress for Farrah. Wes’ stomach was tail spinning he was nervous. He kept repeating in his head Farrah will stay with me. He wanted to believe this was true but pictured visiting her at some random foster home.    

Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Plans Change

     “Well lets go, I can’t wait for your dad to see you!”

     Acacia and her mother were the first to arrive. They had no need to wait in line and went to the front.

     “Hello, Mrs. De Luca.” Said the cute hostess. “Mr. De Luca said to save you the fireside table.”

     “Thank you Christy.” Iris replied. “Oh can you have, Darrel bring us a good merlot as well.”

     “Of course Mrs. De Luca.”

     It wasn’t long before Iris got a text from Dana, saying they had just arrived, and asked if they were already here. Iris texted her back with instructions to head to the Fireside table.

     When Wes arrived at the table he wondered who the bronzed hair girl was at the table, she was kind of cute. He decided to sit across from her, and maybe get to know her. Then it dawned on him. Where was Acacia? He looked at Acacia suspiciously. She stared back at him in annoyed confusion.

     “What” she asked.

     “Acacia is that you?”

      “In the flesh.”

     “Wow, you look well, really” he stopped himself from saying beautiful “really different”.

     “Yeah I was thinking about going for a Mohawk wig, but it just didn’t match the dress.”

     Wes laughed. “No I mean a good different. Healthy.”

    “Your right as opposed to dying girl, yeah this look is better.”

     “Have you met my sister Farrah?” He was glad to change the subject.

     “Oh, my gosh you’re a doll” She said to Farrah.

     Farrah’s face blushed. She had never been called that before and she knew it was good.

     “Thanks.” Farrah said.

     When Bocca reached the table he too was taken aback by Acacia. His eyes got a little watery when he approached her. “It has been a while since I have seen you” he said. “You seem happier.”

     “I think I am.” Acacia replied.

     Drink orders were taken while menus were being passed around. Acacia made Farrah order a Shirley Temple. Farrah had never heard of the drink before, or the actress. Farrah trusted the beautiful girl across the table and excepted that she would like the drink. Wes teased by trying to order a scotch. Peter and Bocca laughed, but  the women became a little upset. Wes apologized and said he was kidding. The night was going pretty well, until a waiter came over to talk with Bocca.

     “Mr. De Luca, there is an urgent matter sir, I am sorry to take you from your family and guests.”

     “Well, duty calls.”

     “Your dad works here?” Wes asked Acacia.

     “No, he just lives here. Wes you didn’t know? He owns the Casino. Did you not see the name of the restaurant?  De Luca Steak House.”

     “Wow, no I kind of had no idea. I knew you guys were probably wealthy, but I didn’t know you owned a casino.”

     “Well to be honest we don’t. The damn thing owns us.”

     “Yeah, I guess so. I had a question, I know this sounds weird, but I have never heard the name Bocca before, except those veggie burgers. Does your dad own those too?”

     Acacia was sipping her ice tea when Wes asked this question. She tried as hard as she could to keep the liquid from squirting out of her mouth. It didn’t work. A spray of ice tea ended up shooting Wes in the face. Acacia’s laugh could be heard from 4 tables away. Her mother looked at her with the best stink eye ever as she saw Wes drying his face.

     Through broken laughter she said, “my dad’s real name is not Bocca, he is Italian so they kind of all have nick names, his name is Jiordano”.

     “Oh, what does Bocca mean then?”

     “Mouth.  Apparently all my uncles complained he would always tell their secrets, he has been Bocca since way before I was born.”

     “Oh, I can see that. I guess having a cool nick name is better than being named after a grandfather you never met.”

     “Wesley isn’t that bad. I have heard of woarse.” Acacia said.

     “Well, yeah Wes isn’t bad it’s the Milton part.”

     Acacia snickered “okay your right, Milton is pretty bad”.

     “Thanks.”

     “Hey it still is not as bad as my mom’s side of the family have you not made the connection yet?”

     Wes thought about it for a second. He had no clue what she was talking about. “I don’t know what you mean.”

     “My mom’s name is Iris, my sister is Sage and of course I’m.” Acacia stopped hoping Wes would catch on.

     “Sorry am I missing something. I really don’t know what you mean.”

     “Really? What is an Iris?”

     “A name.”

     “No what is an Iris as a thing?”

     “A Flower.”

     “Good, and Sage?”

     “A bush.”

     “No not exactly, didn’t you pass Nevada History? What is our state flower?”

     “Oh, sagebrush.”

     “Yes, and Acacia is?”

     “I really have no clue. I have never heard of it until I met you.”

     “Well what do you think it is?”

     “Probably a flower of bush.”

     “Yes, Wes Acacia is actually both trees and bushes and they always flower, so I was named after the Acacia flowers.”

     “So your mom named you after flowers because she has a flower name?”

     “No, actually every women on my mom’s side all my aunts, cousins and even grandmother have flowers as names.”

     “Really?”

     “Yeah, all the girls are named after flowers. Except my Aunt Petunia’s girls. She refused to go along with the tradition because she was called Tuna most of her life. I even called her Auntie Tuna, Petunia was just too hard to say.”

     “Really, so like you have a Rose and Lilly? Wouldn’t you run out of names?”

     “I think that is why I am Acacia, my mom is scraping the barrel for names.”

     “I think it is pretty.”

     “Glad you approve.”

     By the end of the night, everyone was stuffed. The chairs were pushed a little more from the table than when they had begun, and Bocca was even able to come join them the last 15 minutes or so. Apparently there was guest who lost a lot of money and was getting irate at some tables. Security had to taze him after he assaulted a dealer and Bocca had to talk with the police.

     Farrah and Acacia hit it off really well. The Shirley Temple was Farrah’s new favorite drink, and Acacia had promised to some over tomorrow and do her hair before school, since it was a late start.

     The next morning Acacia showed up in plenty of time to do Farrah’s hair. She brought 3 curling irons and tons of product. She also brought some lip gloss, thinking it was probably okay for a 6^th grader. She was wearing more than lip gloss in 6^th grade, but she knew better than to put it on before leaving the house.

     “Farrah your hair is so long, I could do ringlets and it would probably still fall half way down your back.”

     “Well, do whatever you want, I am probably still going to be made fun of today.”

     “What do you mean?”

     Farrah began the whole story, of her biggest tormentor and the phone call that took place the day before. By the end of it Farrah was fuming. “It is just not fair that people listen to her lies” and Farrah stopped herself “never mind she can’t have my power , people will believe what they want, but I will know the truth and not let it bother me.”

     “Farrah if that little bitch excuse my words does what she said she is going to do, you need to tell your brother, or councilor or something. That is beyond bullying, that is really destructive. You need to stand up for yourself, not just sit back.”

     “Really how do I do that?”

     “Well, I am struggling to answer you. What I would do is probably not what I should tell you to do, so I am not going to tell you.”

     “Oh, you think I should kick her ass.”

     Acacia laughed, and said “I didn’t say that”.

     “I know I read your mind. Well actually it is what I wanted to do, but it is automatic expulsion for fighting now, so I don’t want to cause problems while my brother is working so hard to keep me.”

     Acacia felt so bad for Farrah. She was going through so much and here she was brave enough to face this girl, her friends and these lies at school. “You are tough. I don’t know how you do it.”

     “Funny, I was thinking that about you.”

     “What do you mean?”

     “Well, I don’t think I would be brave like you, if I knew I was dying. That is just really scary.”

“Oh, well I think I just had a lot of time to think about it.”

“Maybe I did tool. Maybe that is why I am brave. It is more important to be with Wes than it is to care about what people at school think or say.”

When Acacia finished, Farrah’s hair was layered in curls. Her face glowed as she gazed a herself in the mirror. Acacia handed her a tube of lip gloss, it was a golden pink shade. Farrah put it on and felt really girly, more than she could remember from anytime in her life.

She went to school, willing to take on whatever came to her. She didn’t care if the whole school called her a slut, she was going to work on school work, and hang out with Veronica.

     When she got to school Farrah looked for Veronica, she wanted to show her, her hair. She went to the library first. Veronica mentioned that that was where she went before the first bell. Sure enough that is where she found her. Her face was hiding behind a vampire novel, only her small hands and poufy red hair gave her away.

     “Veronica.” Farrah whispered.

     Veronica peaked over her lowered book. “Farrah” she said, two decibels too high for the librarian across the room. An aggressive hush whooshed from the librarian’s lips.

     “Wow, you came today? And your hair it is awesome. Do you have tryouts for America’s Youngest Top Model?”

     Farrah giggled. “No, but I did want to see you, and show you. Acacia did it. She is a friend of Dana and Peter’s well her parents are. She is 18 like my brother and she came over and did it. So you like it?”

     “Yeah, it looks awesome.” Veronica Said

     “Well, you want to go face Missy with me?” Farrah said.

     “Holy cow, you are going to do it?”

     “What else am I supposed to do? I am not going to hide from her. Then it looks like I really said that. I am going to tell the truth.”

     “Okay Farrah, I will come with you if that is what you want.”

     “Thanks Veronica.”

     When they got to the playground they waited. Farrah new Missy was going to scout her out so she waited. It may have been Farrah’s bigger more voluptuous hair that threw Missy off, because it seemed like it took an extra-long time for Missy and her army to approach the battle field.

     “I can’t believe you showed up.” Rachel said.

     “Why? I am not afraid of Missy’s lies.” Farrah said this loud enough to draw in a crowd.

     “Lies, the only liar is you Scare-Uh.” Said Missy.

     “Well, Missy when you called me up yesterday and said that I told Jake I would go down on him you lied. I would never ever do that. I haven’t even kissed a guy yet, and you think I would do that? Especially with Jake, I mean he has touched you, and I can’t stand you.”

     “Well that is what you said to him.”

     “No actually I told him, I he was dumb for dating Missy Misstress of Evil, and that I was stupid forever liking him.”

     “She did say that. I heard it.” Said Layla.

     Missy glared at Layla with such intensity that Farrah thought lazer beams might shoot from her eyes.

     “You know what Layla, since you want to be a liar like Farrah why don’t you just become her friend?”

     “Maybe I will. She didn’t say she would do that. You are lying. You just don’t like that other people like her. You have even said that you would get even with her and her brother for not painting your backpack. You are evil Missy, and I am a Christian, I shouldn’t associate with the devil.”

     An ooo came from around the crowd that was still gathering. Missy looked around like she was in shock at the others reactions.

     “You know Layla you are just jealous too. You want Jake too, but he is my boyfriend, so now you are going to act like I am the bad guy and make stuff up.”

     “Yeah, because Layla is a liar, I heard Farrah say she wanted to go down on Jake in the construction tubes.” Rachel said.

     The crowd around had a plethora of noises most of the symphony included shocked inhales, but sounds of disgust crept in between gasps.

     “See, I don’t lie. Farrah is the liar because she likes Jake.” Missy said.

     “Correction Missy, I liked Jake. Anyone who would have you as a girlfriend is not anyone I would want to go out with.”

     “Whatever. You know you are lying because you are so jealous.”

     “Hey, Hey,” a boy came from the crowd. “Where is Jake, I bet he would say what was really said.”

     “He is not here today.” Missy said. “He had to go see his Grandma, I think she died or something.”

     Farrah felt instantly sad for Jake. If his Grandmother did die, she knew how that felt. Maggie was the closest thing she had to a grandmother and if his grandmother was anything like Maggie he would be really sad.

     The crowd which had been hoping for a fight, was let down. The closest thing to a fight was a stare down, and the lack of drama cleared the crowed better than tear gas.

     Wes was in his own war, a war with himself. He sat outside Salvation Station, fighting with himself to go in. Maybe the women would not know where she was. Wes reminded himself that this was for Farrah, and if his cowardly mother could save her little brother by doing what she did, he could face his mother.

     When Wes got in he saw for the first time what the Salvation Station was. It was a thrift store, with a food line. He went to the counter and asked a young girl, she looked at least a year or two younger than himself for Debbie. The girl wore a papoose sling over her shoulder that held a small baby.

     “Sure, hold on.” The young mother left the front counter and headed for a door at the back of the counter. “Debbie some guy is here for you.”

     An older women maybe 50 came out. “Can I help you?”

     “Are you Debbie?” Wes asked.

     “Yes, who are you? Wait. Are you Sabeen’s son?”

     “Yeah, I am.”

     “Thought so, you look like her.” This bothered Wes he didn’t want to look like her. “Well hun, whatcha need?”

     “I need to get a hold of Sabeen. The state is going to take my sister away if I don’t. I have a lawyer but the lawyer says my mom needs to be involved.”

     “You are in luck, she is has been clean this month. She is mopping up the sleeping quarters.”

     Wes didn’t realize she was so close. A shiver ran down his back, and left him stuttering.

     “I will take you to her.” Said Debbie.

     “Okay.” Wes followed the grey haired Debbie through a maze of hall ways. When they reached two large double doors Debbie directed him in. “I will give you some privacy.” Debbie pushed opened the door, let him in and then went back the way she came.

     Wes took a step into the large open corridor. There were bunk beds lining the walls on each side. His mother was singing. He couldn’t yet see her, but he could hear the haunting unknown words dancing from her lips. He remembered these words, never understood them but knew she was singing the Koran. His father explained to him once that as a girl she was educated first in memorizing the Koran and that they memorized it as a song. The melody was never the same; it was whatever Allah blessed them with at the time. The sounds transported him back to childhood, a time before Farrah was even around. His mother was happy, happier than he could remember at any time. She would sing like this for him, to put him to sleep or sooth a scraped knee. This woman was a ghost come back to haunt him, in the most gentle way. Sabeen’s figure broke out from a set of bunk beds, her body and mop swayed in rhythm with her voice. Wes felt sad to break up the dream with harsh words, but he was still angry.

     “Hello.” He said.

     Sabeen looked up. “Wesley, is that you?” She walked across the corridor, through the bunk beds.

     “Yeah it is me.”

     “What are you doing here? I mean I am glad you have come, is Farrah all right?”

     “She is for now, but we have had some problems.”

     “Problems, Maggie said there would be no problems if I signed that paper.”

     “There wasn’t until Maggie died mom.”

     Sabeen, stared at Wes. “She is gone?”

     “Yeah, Farrah still takes it hard sometimes. She really loved Maggie. Anyway I need you to meet with my lawyer so I can get custody of Farrah.”

     “I will meet with your lawyer Wes, but I plan on staying clean, and going to a program. I am on a list. It is called Step 2. They will let me have Farrah and help me get a job, a house and stay clean. I want Farrah back. She needs a mother. I have been learning that here.”